Preparing to Say Goodbye
PREPARING TO SAY GOODBYE
There is never an easy time for euthanasia. No matter how much time we are granted, there is never enough time to spend with a loved one. There is a fine line between rationally seeing that no more can be done, and emotionally accepting it as fact. Along with all the emotions that accompany this twilight comes the doubt that possibly more could have been done. These are all perfectly human emotions.
As difficult as it may seem, making these arrangements with some clarity before the final decision is made, can actually decrease the anxiety and stress of actually seeing it through. Some things to consider:
- Create special memories. We hold many dear memories of our beloved pet throughout his/her lifetime but there are some things that might help preserve those memories over time. Making a family video, taking special pictures, going on a car ride to a special place or out for some ice cream, casting a paw print in clay, clipping some fur….these are some ways of preserving special times. They give us something palpable to cherish forever, and help bridge the gap between the physical loss and the emotional connection that never ends.
- Where will this take place? For many, the comfort of home surrounded by friends, family and familiar surroundings is extremely important. Contacting your vet in advance and arranging for a final home visit will eliminate the stress of traveling to the vet clinic. This is particularly important to do in advance if there are logistic issues about traveling with the pet, such as the dog’s weight, ability to move independently, whether or not assistance is needed to place the dog in a vehicle, etc.
- When will this take place? For some people, a specific time can be chosen, depending on very personal and individual issues. While there is finality to making this last “appointment”, for many people it is looked upon as the time to offer a final gift to the beloved pet…a time when the dog will be set free.
- What if there is an emergent need for euthanasia? There are times when unforeseen emergencies happen, when the dog suddenly and inexplicably takes a turn for the worse, or a complication develops without warning. In these circumstances, struggling to find an emergency facility can be devastating and extremely stressful. Knowing in advance where the nearest emergency facility is and having those contact phone numbers can be extremely helpful during this difficult time.
- After the fact: deciding on how to proceed with your pet after the actual euthanasia has taken place is difficult and emotionally draining. Having some kind of plan in advance helps to clearly direct the next steps and decreases the emotional burden of making the decision on the spot. Some people prefer home burials, if their local laws permit. Some choose cremation, so it is important to establish this information in advance with your veterinarian. Others choose not to keep the remains. These are very personal decisions.
In some cases, an autopsy may be possible, especially if the pet was cared for at a veterinary teaching hospital. This is also a very personal decision, but if it might be a consideration, plans should be made in advance. In other cases, if the pet was participating in a clinical research trial, autopsy may be included as part of the learning experience, to help veterinarians understand more about the cancer and pool their resources towards finding a cure.
